I am in my late teens in Illinois (suburbs outside of Chicago, about 1 hour away) and I live with my two parents and older brother as described in the title. We have always struggled with my brother. He’s rebellious, rude, and I’ve always feared his presence. I’ve grown up with him yelling in my mother’s face, pushing her around, throwing her down the stairs, and punching walls. My parents thought this was just a phase, but he failed out of college and came home obviously using drugs. He has now been living in his room for three months, hasn’t gone to work, and is addicted to gaming and substances. He has access to my parents’ bank accounts and has been stealing from them. Recently, he choked my dad during an argument, which was the breaking point. My parents are considering going to the police to discuss getting him into rehab, but we’re scared of his violent behavior and what might happen if we involve law enforcement. I have an appointment with a social worker tomorrow, but I’m worried about revealing everything without risking him getting arrested. What can I do to help him without making the situation worse?
Layperson/not verified as legal professional: Your father and mother need to have him arrested for assault, and then not bail him out. He needs to face the consequences of his actions. There is no way to involuntarily commit him unless he poses a serious danger to himself or others, and from what you describe, he is a danger.
Layperson/not verified as legal professional: You aren’t doing him any favors by avoiding involving the law. He has robbed and assaulted you all. It’s time to let him face his fate; you are enabling him, and it will only get worse.
Attorney: I don’t know if you’re in Cook County, but there’s a process to involuntarily commit someone. However, they can only hold them as long as they’re considered a danger to themselves or others, which might not be long enough. Your family should file for an Order of Protection to get him out of the house and potentially require him to undergo an evaluation.
Layperson/not verified as legal professional: You should see if there is a local harm reduction program. They might help your brother connect to needed services and find ways to make his substance use less harmful if he isn’t ready to quit.
Layperson/not verified as legal professional: Your parents are in actual danger. Choking is a serious sign of increased risk of violence. They need to prosecute him, as this behavior will only escalate. He won’t get better unless he faces real consequences.
Layperson/not verified as legal professional: Why aren’t you scared he’ll hurt you if you have him involuntarily committed? You are enabling him by trying to protect him. You need to be honest about his behavior to get him the help he needs.