My ex-husband was deported for life, and I want to know if there’s a way to transfer his custody rights to my son’s godparents. Specifically, I want his godmother to have custody, and her husband to have some legal authority, so if my son is with them and something happens, they can take him to the hospital or make necessary decisions without needing to track me down.
I still want to keep my share of custody, but since they’ve helped me raise him since birth and treat him as their own, I trust them completely. My son is now 8, and his father has been out of his life since he was 4 months old.
Does anyone know the best way to do this while keeping my rights as his mother? I also want to make sure that if anything happens to me, my son goes to them and not into the system. Any advice?
Are you in the U.S.? I don’t think you fully understand how custody works here.
If your ex had shared custody before he was deported, you need to have that officially changed in court.
You don’t have to give anyone ‘half’ custody to have them involved in your child’s life. You can give them a limited power of attorney so they can seek medical care if needed.
Your child can spend as much time with them as you allow.
If you’re worried about what happens if something happens to you, speak to a lawyer about setting up guardianship.
If it’s a real emergency, paramedics and doctors will treat your son without needing permission. They don’t stop to ask for signatures when saving lives.
You don’t need to transfer custody. Instead, you should talk to a lawyer about setting up a power of attorney, a will, and possibly a trust. This way, they can care for your child if needed without giving up your parental rights.
When my kids were little, I had a notarized letter giving my parents permission to make medical and legal decisions for them in emergencies. A lawyer helped me write it up.
You should go back to court to officially get full custody. That way, you won’t run into problems where a doctor or school asks for the other parent’s signature, which isn’t possible.
If you want your son’s godparents to be able to make emergency decisions, what you need is a power of attorney. That lets them act on your behalf when you’re not available, but it doesn’t take away your rights as his parent.
You sound worried about what happens if you can’t care for your child and he has no other relatives nearby.
Do NOT sign over custody. Instead, talk to a lawyer about setting up a will, a power of attorney, and letters of permission for his godparents. If his father is out of the picture, you might also want to make sure he can’t try to come back into your son’s life unexpectedly.
No, no, no. You already have custody. Talk to a lawyer to make sure you have full legal custody so you don’t run into problems needing the other parent’s signature for things.
You don’t need to give away custody to let someone else take care of your kid when needed. Just give them legal permission to handle medical issues if you’re unavailable. I’m a single mom, and my parents help a lot. That doesn’t mean they need custody.
I have a power of attorney for my stepdaughter because my husband works out of state a lot. Her mom was fine with it since she’s with us most of the year. You should get a lawyer to write one up so you and the godparents know exactly what’s allowed.
