So I’ve got a situation on my hands. I’m divorced and I let my ex-wife take 100% custody of our two kids. I know, I know… hindsight is 20/20, but it seemed like the right decision at the time. However, my kids have recently been telling me some really concerning things about their mother. Both of them have expressed that there are issues going on that really worry me. For instance, my son mentioned physical, psychological, and verbal abuse. He also talked about unhealthy living conditions and even hunger. It gets worse; he said that she makes him work and then takes his money as ‘debt.’ That’s just a few things, and honestly, it feels pretty shocking. I’m starting to think about the possibility of gaining primary custody, but from what I remember growing up and all the stories I’ve heard, it feels pretty overwhelming. I’m tagged this as MA because I know the laws vary. Just to clarify, I currently live in a different state from them.
How often do you actually get to see your kids? Do you have a set schedule for visitation, or does it vary?
Yeah, that’s a good question. If you’re only visiting when it’s convenient for you, it might make it harder to gain custody if you report anything.
Both kids need to be telling you the same stories, right? It’s important to know if both are experiencing this so you have a solid case.
You’ve got to have some proof to back up those claims. Are they being consistent with their stories?
You mentioned that your daughter was involved in an incident recently. How has she been handling it overall? Is there more to her story?
From what you’ve shared, this sounds like it could definitely be considered abuse. Make sure to document everything that happens.
So do you have a stable job and a good place to live? Courts are definitely going to want to know that you can provide for the kids.
I do have a job and I own a home. I’ve even gotten remarried and have another child now. Just trying to provide a good environment.
If your son is 15, he can express his wishes to the court about wanting to live with you. That could definitely play in your favor assuming everything checks out.
So just to be clear, how old are the kids right now?
Have they reported anything to their school counselors? That can often lead to action being taken if there’s abuse happening.
You might want to get in touch with local child protective services to discuss what you’ve been told. They can help advise on next steps.
At the end of the day, you need to prioritize those kids’ safety. If you think something serious is happening, definitely take action.