I just found out that my child has been getting hit by my co-parent’s spouse. Someone told me they’ve been physically hurting my child, and now I’m wondering—should I take this to court? I already reached out to my lawyer, but it might be a few days before I hear back. Has anyone else dealt with this? What happened? Did the court actually do something? Thanks for any advice.
Something similar happened with my husband and his kids. CPS called and told him to come pick up his daughter. Turns out, her mom and stepdad got into a fight right in front of my stepdaughter and her half-brother. That was considered child abuse. Now, my stepdaughter lives with us full-time in another state, and she decides when she wants to see her mom. We encourage her to go, but we don’t force it.
This comment was removed.
Rene said:
This comment was removed.
Throwing around baseless accusations doesn’t help anyone. If you actually have something important to say, there’s a way to do it without making things worse.
@Nyx
If you wait too long, you’re going to be playing catch-up, and that won’t help your child. It’s no different from profiling criminals—people do it professionally. But yeah, they should be held to a higher standard.
That might not legally be considered abuse if your state allows corporal punishment. If the co-parent’s spouse was given permission to discipline the child, then it’s not technically abuse in the eyes of the law. If anything, you’d need to go to court to change the custody agreement so they’re not allowed to use corporal punishment.
@HOPE
You have no idea what you’re talking about.
@HOPE
Where did the original poster say this was about corporal punishment?
Spanking is legal in every state (unfortunately), but some states have stricter rules than others.
Lian said:
@HOPE
Where did the original poster say this was about corporal punishment?
Spanking is legal in every state (unfortunately), but some states have stricter rules than others.
Corporal punishment just means physical punishment. So if they hit the child, that would fall under corporal punishment. I’m not saying I agree with it, but just hitting a child isn’t automatically abuse under the law.
@HOPE
That depends on a lot of things, and we don’t have any details.
@HOPE
Most states have limits on what’s considered acceptable punishment. It’s very possible that what happened here goes beyond what the law allows.
@HOPE
All I know right now is that my co-parent posted about this in a parenting group, and someone from that group called CPS on them. I don’t know exactly what they said, but if a whole group felt the need to report it, it probably wasn’t good. Maybe even my co-parent is also being hit?
@RobertGabriel
If you know which group it was, you might want to reach out and see if anyone saved the post or remembers what was said.
Zyan said:
@RobertGabriel
If you know which group it was, you might want to reach out and see if anyone saved the post or remembers what was said.
I wish I could, but they blocked me and my whole family on every social media app. I even tried reaching out and saying I’d listen if they needed to vent, but they ignored me.
@HOPE
Are you seriously saying that as long as a state allows spanking, hitting a kid is never abuse? What if they get smacked in the face? What if they’re hit so hard they get bruises? What if they’re hit with something dangerous?
Come on, think this through.
@Marlo
That’s not what I said. I said corporal punishment is legal in some places, which means hitting a child isn’t always considered abuse by law. I’m not saying I agree with that—I’m just saying that’s how the legal system sees it. If there are bruises or worse injuries, then yeah, that changes things. But I never said that kind of violence is okay.
@HOPE
Not all hitting is considered legal punishment. Even if there aren’t bruises.
Courts decide on a case-by-case basis because the laws are so vague.
Auden said:
@HOPE
Not all hitting is considered legal punishment. Even if there aren’t bruises.
Courts decide on a case-by-case basis because the laws are so vague.
What he said is still true—just because a child is hit doesn’t automatically mean it’s legally abuse.
@Brittany
The way they worded it left no room for nuance. They made it sound like hitting is always okay as long as corporal punishment is allowed.
Micah said:
@Brittany
The way they worded it left no room for nuance. They made it sound like hitting is always okay as long as corporal punishment is allowed.
His exact words were:
> ‘Technically that is NOT abuse if your state allows corporal punishment. If the co-parent’s spouse was given permission, that is not abuse. You would need a custody modification to change that.’
That’s what he said.