So I have this situation where the custodial parent suddenly decided that my next visit with the kids, who are 10 and 14, will be supervised. We’ve had unsupervised visits since 2021, which were mutually agreed upon in court, and there’s never been a problem. Back in 2023, I even petitioned for overnights, which the custodial parent agreed to during the summer and school breaks. Now, with a court date coming up on April 2nd, I’ve petitioned for more overnights, but the custodial parent checked the box to switch things to supervised visits without any real reasoning for it. In the past, they wanted supervised visits but ended up with unsupervised overnights after a social worker removed themselves from future hearings due to no concerns. I had a visit on March 8, and when I asked if it would be an overnight due to spring break, they said no. But then when we exchanged, the kids mentioned they only had to go to Target later, and I asked if it would be an overnight or not. They said it would be, but then I got a message saying I disrespected them for asking about it in front of the kids. The kids are aware they stay over during school breaks. Now, they are saying the next visit is supervised at their house, and I feel like I should wait until court to discuss this since I haven’t done anything wrong to warrant a supervised visit. I’ve attached messages showing a pattern of them postponing visits over minor issues. Should I go to this supervised visit or just hold off and bring it up in court?
You should definitely show up at the agreed time for the exchange. If they refuse to let you see the kids, you can file for contempt of court since the original order doesn’t require supervision. They can’t just change the parenting order like that without a court ruling.
Yeah, it sounds like the custodial parent is trying to unilaterally change things without any valid reason. If you’ve had unsupervised visits for so long, they can’t just decide to make it supervised out of the blue. Make sure you document everything that happens.
@Quincy
What do you mean by documenting? Like writing it down?
Maya said:
@Quincy
What do you mean by documenting? Like writing it down?
Exactly, keep a record of communications and any incidents that occur. This will help your case in court.
It seems odd that they would change it like this. If you had overnights agreed upon, they can’t just say no and force supervision. I think attending the visit is important to show you’re willing to follow the existing agreement.
@Channing
But what if they don’t let him see the kids? Wouldn’t that just make things worse?
Jasmine said:
@Channing
But what if they don’t let him see the kids? Wouldn’t that just make things worse?
Not really, because it sets a precedent that they aren’t following the court order. It’s all about showing the judge that you’ve tried to follow the rules.
You need to be careful. Skipping a visit could look bad in court. Just show up and if they refuse, make it clear in your documentation. You shouldn’t give them any reason to think they can control the situation like this.
If the kids are saying they only have to go to Target, it seems like they might not have any serious plans anyway. It’s important to keep the lines of communication open with them about what’s going on.
@Rafe
Totally agree. Kids often pick up on the tension and that can affect them. Keeping things normal and fun is key.