I’m seeking advice regarding custody and visitation for my daughter with my ex-boyfriend. We were never married, and he recently moved to Texas with his mother, his sister (who was arrested on drug charges in January 2024), her son, and his two sons from a previous relationship. They all live in a four-bedroom house, but he’s currently sleeping on the couch. His sister’s dogs, which are pitbulls, have a history of aggression, including a recent incident where one bit a neighbor.
We don’t have a custody agreement in place, and our daughter lives with me in Oklahoma. Given the situation and his new living arrangements, I’ve been concerned about her safety and well-being if she were to visit him in Texas. I’ve also been uncomfortable with the idea of him bringing his family to stay with us during his visits, especially since he wants to stay at my home for weekends.
I suggested he find a place closer to Oklahoma to make it easier for him to see all his children and ensure our daughter has a suitable place to stay. However, he said that moving would be inconvenient for him, especially since his mother is currently helping with childcare due to one of his sons’ allergies.
Can anyone provide guidance on how to handle this situation? What steps can I take to formalize custody and visitation rights, and what factors should I consider to ensure my daughter’s safety and well-being?
If safety is a concern, the custodial parent can arrange visits at their home or a responsible third party’s. Police generally don’t handle custody disputes unless safety is at risk or there’s a court order. The court decides custody based on jurisdiction, existing orders, and recent residence. Without a court order, the custodial parent decides visitation, but refusal may impact custody decisions. Don’t use visitation refusal to get child support; instead, contact the Child Support Recovery Unit or an attorney. Follow court orders to avoid contempt charges and request changes through the court
Get yourself a family lawyer and present all this to them, they’re best suited to advise accordingly. In addition, ensure you have evidence , strong evidence of your ex, the child’s father’s living condition and the condition of the home he stays in. If the home places your child at risk, getting full custody shouldn’t be an issue. The father can travel over to your town if he wants to see his child.