Hello! I am helping my friend with a situation involving her abusive child’s father. We are gathering information to file a Temporary Protective Order (TPO) currently, but I have questions in the meantime.
For context, the father (32M) has been incarcerated since before the baby (6 months) was born. My friend (29F) separated from him while he was in jail. He sends her harassing messages through email and calls, claiming he wants to speak to his son. When she doesn’t engage, he threatens to file for custody when he gets out. This is his 5th child with 4 different mothers, and he has no rights to the other kids, so we aren’t overly concerned about that. However, we want to ensure she handles this situation properly.
Is she required to answer calls from the jail or facilitate a relationship while he is incarcerated? I’ve advised her to answer, record, and gray rock until we have clarity.
If he’s sending her harassing messages, there’s no obligation to respond. Why engage with someone who is harassing you? I recommend filing for a TRO immediately and keeping a record of all messages.
That was my first thought as well. Just wanted to ensure we weren’t doing the wrong thing. The baby can’t talk yet, so it’s clear this is a manipulation tactic. We’re working on the TPO and keeping a paper trail. Thank you so much for the advice!
Located in KY. Parents are not married. The baby has his last name, but he was incarcerated at birth, so I’ll check on established paternity. Thank you so much!
Do you know why your friend would give the baby his last name given the circumstances? I’m just curious, not judging. Did she know she was the 4th baby mother?