I started living at a friend’s house after a big argument with my mom. Just to be clear, I’m not looking for advice on how to fix things with my mom. Everyone involved, including her best friend and even my grandpa, agrees she’s in the wrong. My grandpa even suggested getting the police involved. My mom has been receiving social security for me and my brother since our dad passed away. She wasn’t married to him at the time, and the money is supposed to be for us. My brother moved out when he turned 18 and took his share, but I just turned 17, so she still controls mine.
I don’t have a stable place to live unless I can pay rent, and I had to quit my job since my mom was my only transportation. Is there any way I can get the social security money without my mom’s approval? I’ve heard that some states can force me to stay with her because I’m not 18 yet. If I could get her to agree, or if there’s another way around it, I really need the money to cover my expenses.
Once you turn 18, your mom won’t get the money anymore. You should start looking for a job so you can pay rent. Even if she gave you the money now, it stops when you turn 18 anyway, so you’d need to work after that.
She’s getting the social security as a surviving parent, not for you directly. The money is meant for your care, but it’s not something you can control until you’re 18. You can’t do much about it, and the Social Security office won’t discuss it with you.
@Quinby
That’s not correct. There’s a difference between spousal survivor benefits and child survivor benefits. The child survivor benefits are meant for the care of the child, not the parent.
Griff said: @Quinby
That’s not correct. There’s a difference between spousal survivor benefits and child survivor benefits. The child survivor benefits are meant for the care of the child, not the parent.
The child survivor benefits are for the parent or guardian to use for the child’s care. They aren’t paid directly to the child until they turn 18.
Griff said: @Quinby
That’s not correct. There’s a difference between spousal survivor benefits and child survivor benefits. The child survivor benefits are meant for the care of the child, not the parent.
Unless you’re legally emancipated, the Social Security office won’t discuss your case with you. Your mom is legally in charge of the benefits as long as she’s your guardian.
You should call Social Security and report the situation. They might set up a different person as your representative payee, but the money stops when you turn 19 or finish high school, whichever comes first. The money is supposed to be used by whoever is financially supporting you, similar to child support.
You won’t see the money while your mom is your guardian. You’ll need your birth certificate to apply for a new social security card. Once you have it, you can go to the Social Security office, but as long as your mom is your legal guardian, the money will go to her. Only a new guardian could get it on your behalf.
I’m not a lawyer, but that money is intended for your care, not for you directly. It’s for your mom to use to provide for you. It would only be yours if Social Security required it to be saved for you, which they don’t. I’m a widow, and I receive social security for my child, so I’m familiar with how it works.
Go to the Social Security office and explain that you’re no longer living with your mom. They might consider giving the money to you directly if you can prove you’re responsible enough to handle it. If you have a trusted adult, they could help you in case Social Security doesn’t think you can manage it on your own.
They’ll also let your mom know she’s no longer receiving the benefits and that any money she saved for you will need to be given back to you.
@Quilla
Social Security won’t talk to a minor without their guardian, and they definitely won’t let a 17-year-old manage their own benefits. Unless OP’s mom willingly gives the money up, it’s out of OP’s hands until someone else gets legal custody.
@Quilla
A 17-year-old can’t legally handle their own finances. The money will continue to go to OP’s mom unless someone else is appointed as their legal guardian. Otherwise, in the eyes of the law, OP is considered a runaway.
Zelda said:
When my daughter turned 18, her social security benefits stopped even though she still had almost a year of high school left.
You should’ve received a notice 3 months before benefits were set to end. It would have explained how to keep getting them if your daughter was still in school. Unfortunately, they only send one notice, so if you miss it, it’s a hassle.
Zelda said:
When my daughter turned 18, her social security benefits stopped even though she still had almost a year of high school left.
Your daughter could’ve continued receiving benefits until 19 as long as she was still in school. But Social Security is a pain to deal with, and getting her back on would have probably cost more in legal fees than the benefits were worth.
It doesn’t matter if your mom was married to your dad or not, she can still get social security for his minor children. I receive benefits for my kids after their dad passed, and we were divorced. While your mom could save the money, it’s usually used for basic needs—food, rent, clothes, etc. Raising kids isn’t cheap. If your relationship with your mom is that bad, there’s not much you can do unless you change guardianship. Also, your brother probably stopped receiving his benefit once he turned 18.
@Auden
You can keep getting survivor benefits after turning 18 if you’re still in high school and submit the proper paperwork. In that case, the payments go directly to you.