Hey all, I’ve been married for 27 years, and last week my husband just up and left without a word. This isn’t the first time he’s done this, but this time feels different. I don’t think I want him to come back. The house is in my name (I bought out his half about 10 years ago), and he’s at his sister’s place in Michigan right now. He keeps messaging, saying he wants to either grab his stuff with a U-Haul or move back in. I’m honestly not sure what to do. Anyone been through something similar?
Wow, that sounds really tough. Have you thought about talking to a lawyer to see what your options are? Since you own the house, that might give you some protection.
San said:
Wow, that sounds really tough. Have you thought about talking to a lawyer to see what your options are? Since you own the house, that might give you some protection.
Yeah, I’m considering it. I just don’t know if I want to go all the way with a divorce yet.
San said:
Wow, that sounds really tough. Have you thought about talking to a lawyer to see what your options are? Since you own the house, that might give you some protection.
Totally get that… sometimes it’s about making sure you’re protected first. Maybe look into what rights you have with him out of state?
I went through something similar. My ex would always bounce in and out of our relationship. Eventually, I had to put my foot down. You might feel more in control if you set some boundaries.
Zaden said:
I went through something similar. My ex would always bounce in and out of our relationship. Eventually, I had to put my foot down. You might feel more in control if you set some boundaries.
Thanks, yeah, it feels like he knows exactly how to get back in every time, and I’m kind of tired of it.
Zaden said:
I went through something similar. My ex would always bounce in and out of our relationship. Eventually, I had to put my foot down. You might feel more in control if you set some boundaries.
Exactly! You gotta do what’s best for you, especially if he keeps playing games like this.
Are you able to just ignore him and see if he gets the message? Sometimes going silent speaks louder than any conversation.
Malik said:
Are you able to just ignore him and see if he gets the message? Sometimes going silent speaks louder than any conversation.
That’s basically what I’m doing now. Just ignoring the texts. It’s easier that way.
Malik said:
Are you able to just ignore him and see if he gets the message? Sometimes going silent speaks louder than any conversation.
Silent treatment is powerful, lol. Just make sure you’re prepared if he shows up unannounced though!
Since you bought him out of the house, he probably doesn’t have any legal claim to it. Maybe get a lawyer to confirm, just in case?
Speaker7 said:
Since you bought him out of the house, he probably doesn’t have any legal claim to it. Maybe get a lawyer to confirm, just in case?
Good point. I didn’t think about that part. I’ll definitely look into it.
Speaker7 said:
Since you bought him out of the house, he probably doesn’t have any legal claim to it. Maybe get a lawyer to confirm, just in case?
Lawyers can help clarify stuff like that. Plus, if you do end up going for a divorce, you’ll be ahead of the game.
If he’s in Michigan now, he’d probably have to live there for a while before filing for divorce from there. So you’ve got time to figure things out if you want to file in your state first.
Amelia said:
If he’s in Michigan now, he’d probably have to live there for a while before filing for divorce from there. So you’ve got time to figure things out if you want to file in your state first.
Oh really? I didn’t know there was a time requirement like that. That actually helps me a bit.
Amelia said:
If he’s in Michigan now, he’d probably have to live there for a while before filing for divorce from there. So you’ve got time to figure things out if you want to file in your state first.
Yep, every state has residency requirements. Good luck with whatever you decide!