Hello, I need some legal advice. Here’s some background: I’ve been married almost 6 years to a legal US resident (I’m undocumented, brought here as a child). We have a young child together. He has an alcohol dependency (high-functioning drunk), and I recently found out at the ER that he has a chemical dependency as well. The abuse started verbally after I became pregnant and had to stop working. Over the years, I’ve become alienated from friends and family, so I don’t really have a support group. The abuse has escalated to include physical abuse (neighbors called the cops for a wellness check), affecting both me and our child. I have close to no access to money and limited transportation. I reached a breaking point in mid-December and contacted his family, as I had no one else to turn to. His family is very kind and has offered to pick me and our child up while he’s at work and take us out of state to stay with them. They want to do an intervention, but I fear that if I leave the state, he could claim parental alienation and take custody of our child. If I stay, I have nowhere to go. Other info: He has refused to help with my legal status. He drinks daily to the point of passing out, affecting his work. I’ve lost count of how many times he’s called out due to hangovers. His temper is very volatile. His dad set me up with an immigration lawyer (family of his), and I have an older child who can petition for me, but funds are limited. I asked about filing for VAWA, but the lawyer seems unwilling to help, saying it’s easier to get the petition through my eldest child. I have no access to my family, so I can’t get the passport and visa used when I came here (now expired), which complicates things. If I do file, I’d have to leave the country for up to 2 years, and I’m unsure if I can take my child. He has threatened to have me deported if I leave and has kicked me out of the house. When the cops came for a wellness check, they wanted me to go with them, but I was terrified due to my status. I have several voice recordings of how he treats me and messages, as well as a recent video of him being aggressive towards our young child. I stepped in to protect my child. If I leave with his family to another state, can he take custody of our child? I’m truly scared. I’ve reached out to my consulate and found some in-person help available, but with limited transportation and funds, I can’t get there.
Layperson/not verified as legal professional: Go to a shelter and find resources from them. If you think his family will genuinely help and aren’t setting you up, then that may be the way to go. But talk to a lawyer first.
Layperson/not verified as legal professional: Have you spoken with any domestic violence shelters? They will have the knowledge and resources you need.
OP: I have spoken to someone from Esperanza United, but due to circumstances, I haven’t been able to get solid answers (was without a phone for a couple of weeks).
Layperson/not verified as legal professional: Definitely reach out to domestic violence hotlines. They can guide you on legal steps and help you find a safe place to go.
Layperson/not verified as legal professional: Document everything you can. Those recordings and messages could be crucial if you go to court.
Marlon said:
Layperson/not verified as legal professional: Document everything you can. Those recordings and messages could be crucial if you go to court.
I’ve been trying to keep track of everything, but it’s hard when I’m scared all the time.