Pro se ex parte custody hearing

Hello. I’m representing myself in an ex parte hearing for sole custody due to the mother’s ongoing drug abuse and neglect (she’s fallen asleep while caring for our kids). The judge hasn’t granted it yet but scheduled a hearing in 14 days. Unfortunately, I’m going pro se because I have debt from the divorce and am caring for our 4 kids about 85% of the time without receiving any support (I’m working on that separately).

I’m seeking advice on what to present in court and what I can expect during the hearing. I have text messages as proof of her behavior, but some of the evidence is based on what the kids have told me. I also have recent texts from her asking me to sell her my schedule 1 medicine, older texts, and videos from before the divorce, along with a DFS neglect report.

Any tips or experiences you could share would be greatly appreciated!

First, make sure you organize all of your evidence—texts, videos, and the DFS report—into a neat, clear file. You’ll need to present it concisely. You should also consider subpoenaing the DFS reporter, which is a straightforward process that involves filling out a couple of forms. Make sure to read the court’s rules on serving documents and ensure your ex receives copies of everything in time. Stick to facts, keep emotions in check, and focus on the best interests of the kids.

@Gwendolyn
Thank you for the tip! I hadn’t thought about subpoenaing the DFS reporter. I’ll make sure to get everything organized and file the evidence properly.

At the hearing, focus on presenting facts related to your ex’s behavior and how it affects the children. Judges typically care about how the situation impacts the well-being of the kids. If your children are old enough, you might also be able to request their input in the case, but that depends on the court’s policy. Definitely mention the DFS report and make sure you have copies of everything ready for the court and your ex.

@Catherine
Good point. I’ll focus on how it’s impacting the kids. The DFS report seems like a key piece of evidence, so I’ll make sure to mention that prominently.

Keep your presentation clear and to the point. Stick to the evidence, like the texts where she asked for the schedule 1 medicine. It’s important to avoid making it too emotional or personal; just show the facts and how they impact the kids. Make sure to file everything correctly, and if you can, ask the court for an advocate to represent the children’s best interests.

@Eren
Thanks for the advice. I’ll focus on being factual and clear. I’ll also ask about getting an advocate for the kids—good suggestion!

Make sure you emphasize the safety of your kids. Any time she was neglectful or put them in harm’s way (falling asleep, asking for drugs), bring it up with concrete evidence. Your job is to prove the situation is not safe for the children and that you can provide a stable environment.

@Delilah
I’ll definitely focus on the safety aspect. It’s the main concern here, and I’ll make sure to highlight that. Thanks for the tip!