I have a visitation coming up soon, and I’m not entirely sure what to expect or how to behave. It’s my first time attending one, and I want to make sure I show respect and handle everything appropriately.
Could someone please share what typically happens at a visitation? What should I wear? Is there a specific way to greet the family? Are there any customs or traditions I should be aware of?
Any advice on how to offer condolences or support to the family would be greatly appreciated as well.
Of course, yes. And for years to come, people will remember your thoughtful act. I remember who visited me even though I lost my mother when I was little. It would be inappropriate to cry uncontrollably during the visitation, but kindness is never bothersome. You’ve demonstrated your support when you arrive, sign in, greet the coworker, express your regret for her loss, then, when you’re ready, gently leave.
My code of etiquette is that there are some events, like someone else’s wedding or funeral, where it’s not appropriate to make a statement, draw attention to yourself, or make waves unless expressly asked. Even if you think a dress code is too strict or silly, it’s important to blend in and not stick out.
With that in mind, some items will never be inappropriate or too over-dressed: simple dresses and skirts in dark colors, jumpsuits, dress pants a polo or button-up shirt, and blazers. It’s always better to be over-dressed than under-dressed, as it communicates respect for the occasion and the people involved.
Coming from a small town, I’ve seen people show up to visitations looking very casual, and I’ve always felt the least they could do was wear something clean.
So, aim for clean, business casual attire, and you’ll be fine.
It can be intimidating to attend a visitation, particularly if it is your first time. At funerals, people usually choose a polite setting where they honour the deceased’s relatives. Business casual or dark colours are appropriate. Sombre and polite dress is also appropriate.
It is usual to meet the family with a brief message of condolence, like “I am so sorry for your loss.” Customs such as signing a guestbook, bringing flowers, or sending a card of sorrow may also exist.
Being there for the family and listening to them are frequently the most consoling forms of support. If there is anything specific you can do to help, please do not hesitate to ask.
I am hoping you find strength in this time of need. Take care.
I understand how attending a visitation for the first time can feel daunting. Typically, a visitation is a time to offer condolences to the family of the deceased, often held before the funeral. It’s customary to dress in conservative, dark clothing as a sign of respect. When greeting the family, a simple, heartfelt expression like “I’m so sorry for your loss” is appropriate.
Depending on your relationship with the deceased and their family, you might share a brief memory or offer a comforting touch, like a handshake or a gentle hug. Be mindful of the family’s cues; if they seem open to conversation, you can engage more, but if they appear overwhelmed, keep your interaction brief. Offering your presence and support during this difficult time is what’s most important.
Consider dressing in conservative and respectful attire. Dark or muted colors are often preferred, such as black, gray, or navy. Avoid bright colors or flashy attire.