I’m in a tough spot right now and desperately need some advice. I’ve been dealing with an abusive partner who keeps guns in our house, which I do not own and cannot legally possess due to a felony from years ago. I’m terrified, especially for my 5-year-old daughter.
He has already physically harmed me—I’ve got a black eye from him, and he’s shown that he’s capable of more violence. When I try to lock myself away to feel safe, he destroys doors trying to get in. It’s like living in a nightmare.
I’ve thought about calling the cops multiple times, but I fear the repercussions. He constantly threatens me, saying he’ll tell them the guns are mine, which could get me in serious trouble. I’ve asked him repeatedly to remove the firearms, but he refuses and tells me I can’t leave without consequences to our home.
I feel completely trapped—physically, emotionally, and now financially. If I call the police, will I end up in jail too? I want to protect my daughter and myself, but I don’t know what to do.
Any advice or support would mean the world to me right now. Thank you.
Hi,
It would help if you took action today—without telling him. Speak to a lawyer, ideally someone specializing in family law, and reach out to a women’s shelter for guidance. They can help you navigate this situation safely.
It’s crucial to keep your plans private as you seek the advice you need to create a safer environment for you and your child.
Your priority must be your child’s safety; they’re witnessing this abuse, and it’s vital to get out for their sake.
Reach out to your parole or probation officer and explain the situation—mention the abuse and the guns in the home, and express your fears for your safety and your daughter’s. You could also consider calling the police to report the same concerns. Being proactive in reporting these issues may help protect you and show that you’re seeking safety.
Leave immediately and go straight to the police station to file a report. If your fingerprints aren’t on the guns and his are, that clearly shows they belong to him. You should charge him with assault and let the police handle the situation. Additionally, consider filing a restraining order to prevent him from coming back to the house. After that, seek a good lawyer who can help you navigate your options, including potentially getting the house turned over to you. Your safety and well-being come first.
Do you have access to the guns? Are they stored in a safe along with items like your passport? Do you know the code to that safe?
I’m not a lawyer, so it’s best to consult with one for specific advice. However, depending on your state’s laws, you generally shouldn’t be in possession or have control of the firearms.
If they’re locked away in a safe and don’t include any of your personal documents, and you don’t even know the code, I wouldn’t stress too much about it. Many felons live with roommates who have guns.