I have decided not to risk it. I fully acknowledge my mistake in this situation and see it as a lesson learned for the future. If I had known about this possibility earlier, I would have given my ex-husband ample notice. It’s still disappointing that the kids might miss out on this opportunity, especially after a challenging year health-wise for us.
I am divorced and share 50/50 custody with my ex-husband. According to our parenting agreement for vacations and summer periods:
Each parent can have up to seven consecutive days of parenting time twice a year for vacations. Both parents need to schedule their vacations so they don’t interfere with special parenting times.
The traveling parent must give the other parent details about the trip, including dates, destinations, flight information, and contact details while away.
Any summer vacation plans must be notified at least 30 days in advance each year. Mom gets to choose in even-numbered years, and Dad in odd-numbered years.
This year, it’s my turn to choose first. Unfortunately, I didn’t give my ex-husband the required 30-day notice. I only gave him 9 days’ notice. Recently, I’ve had two surgeries with complications during recovery, requiring visits to wound care. Additionally, my youngest son is having surgery later this month, and I’ve returned to demanding college courses after 13 years. My husband and I weren’t sure if vacation was possible this summer until an opportunity arose for us to take the kids on vacation with their grandparents. This left us with only 9 days’ notice for my co-parent.
Initially, my ex-husband denied my original dates (July 15-22). Later, he messaged offering different dates (July 16-23) without specifying a response deadline. Unfortunately, I missed this message initially because my husband and I were occupied with final affairs after his grandmother’s passing. When I eventually responded within 48 hours to accept the modified dates, he said my delay meant he wouldn’t approve those dates anymore. This was very disheartening, especially since earlier this month he took the kids on vacation with their other grandparents with only 7 days’ notice.
I understand the importance of vacation and family time, so despite the short notice, I agreed to the modified dates. However, my ex-husband still refuses to approve them, and I offered him the option to make up for his missed days on dates of his choice, which he declined. Although tempted to go on this vacation anyway, I’m worried about potential legal consequences. I’m certain my ex-husband would take legal action if I did take the kids on vacation without his approval.
My question is, what kind of legal trouble could I face if I take them anyway? I’ve been clear about my intentions to take the kids on vacation with their grandparents, and I don’t want to do anything that could harm the kids or get me into trouble. This situation is very distressing, and I’m holding onto hope that we can still go on this vacation.