My husband and I are firmly married, and I have no safety concerns about him. He is the sole breadwinner in the family. He has had some legal issues in the past, but has completed his programs and all of the records are sealed now. I am experiencing some health concerns during this pregnancy and want to ensure that if I do not survive childbirth, my child will stay with my husband. My mother can be somewhat litigious, and I don’t put it past her to try to take my child from him. I do not want this, as she is not fit to raise an infant. I figured custody would automatically go to my husband if I pass, but I wanted to see if there was anything I could put in place to ensure that arrangement is permanent.
She would have a pretty hard time getting any kind of custody. She might be able to sue for visitation but that’s it. Both of you need to make a will. And find a guardian for your child in case both of you die. I also highly recommend life insurance for both of you.
@Chen
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Make a will, spelling it out. It’s worth the money.
Bay said:
Make a will, spelling it out. It’s worth the money.
Custody doesn’t transfer via a will.
Assuming he’s the biological father, custody goes to him. Period.
Perrin said:
Assuming he’s the biological father, custody goes to him. Period.
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Yes, Colorado does have grandparent rights. The best way to ward these off is to have very little relationship with a grandparent. If the child is born and the grandparent pushes for rights, and you can show that they have no relationship with the child, it can be shut down pretty quickly.
Grandparent rights are supposed to be invoked when a grandparent has been semi-raising the child and the parents try to cut them off. This can be a shock to the child’s system, so the court may aim to maintain that relationship for the good of the child.
If there is no child-grandparent relationship, grandparents have less to stand on.
@Reese
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The first thing you need to do is find out what the laws are in your state regarding grandparents’ rights. Some states will grant them if the other parent dies.
Marlow said:
The first thing you need to do is find out what the laws are in your state regarding grandparents’ rights. Some states will grant them if the other parent dies.
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Custody goes to the father. If you’re deceased, she can go to court to request visitation.
If you do not want that to happen for a good reason, I’d encourage you to see an estate attorney to have both of you create your wills and have some documented proof left behind explaining why you would be opposed to it, so it’s not just your husband keeping your child from her.
@Reagan
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Custody would automatically go to your husband. There is nothing that would prevent your mother from filing for custody. That said, there is a very difficult presumption to overcome that parents should raise their children. It’s not a matter of ‘who is more fit to raise these kids’; it’s ‘this is the parent, and unless there is some truly heinous and compelling reason he shouldn’t be allowed to raise his kids, we don’t evaluate who is most fit to raise them.’
@Rene
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