My daughter needs dental work, and it’s going to cost me $400 out of pocket. Her father and I have always split costs 50/50, but we don’t have anything legally written down. I’ve called and texted him multiple times, but he won’t respond. I also take my daughter to all her appointments, even when it’s supposed to be his time. I’m so frustrated because I shouldn’t have to chase him down for this. Should I take legal action? Where do I even start?
It might be time to take legal action. For now, keep all communication in text so you have proof. Save every message and receipt to show what you’ve paid. Documentation is key!
You should file for child support.
Going through the same thing. My daughter needed braces, and my ex agreed to pay half. Instead, she spent money on two fancy vacations with her boyfriend.
Now she’s making excuses and saying I haven’t paid my share (which I have). Meanwhile, I had to hire a lawyer to force her to hand over her bank records. Once I get those, I’ll prove she had the money but chose vacations over her kid’s teeth.
It’s disgusting that some parents act like this.
You need a court order. Without one, he doesn’t have to pay anything. Why haven’t you set one up?
If there’s nothing in writing, then he technically doesn’t have to pay. He should because it’s his kid, but if it’s not legally required, you might not be able to force him. Get it in writing next time.
I’m a family law attorney in California.
If you don’t have a child support order that includes medical expenses, you’d need to file a Request for Order to modify child support and request mandatory add-ons under Family Code 4063.
Here’s the law: https://leginfo.legislature.ca.gov/faces/codes_displaySection.xhtml?lawCode=FAM§ionNum=4063
You’ll need proof of payment, receipts, and documentation.
@Demi
We don’t have a child support order or anything through the court. Can I still file?
Day said:
@Demi
We don’t have a child support order or anything through the court. Can I still file?
Yes, you’d file a new Request for Order for child support, not a modification. You should also request guideline support so there’s a clear, enforceable order.
Day said:
@Demi
We don’t have a child support order or anything through the court. Can I still file?
You can’t modify something that doesn’t exist. You need to start a child support case from scratch.
So you don’t have any kind of court order, or is it just medical and dental that aren’t covered?
Did you talk to him before scheduling the dental work? Without a court order, you might not be able to force him to pay, especially if he never agreed to it.
If he won’t co-parent properly, you have two options: accept it and prepare to cover everything yourself, or take him to court and make it official.
Just know that once the courts are involved, they stay involved. If you go this route, be ready for the long haul. It’s frustrating, but some parents only step up when they’re legally forced to.
You could take him to small claims court. There’s also an app for co-parents to track shared expenses—maybe try that?
In most places, child support orders cover medical and dental costs. Good parents figure this out without going to court, but unfortunately, some need a judge to tell them what they should already know.
Try sitting down with him first. If that doesn’t work, take legal action.
@Natalie
‘Non-Cletus states’ cracked me up! Took me a second to get what you meant!
DolphGabbana said:
@Natalie
‘Non-Cletus states’ cracked me up! Took me a second to get what you meant!
You know where the toothbrush was invented? West Virginia!
DolphGabbana said:
@Natalie
‘Non-Cletus states’ cracked me up! Took me a second to get what you meant!
You know where the toothbrush was invented? West Virginia!
Did not know that—learn something new every day!
Depending on where you live, the state might help you collect the money. If you’re not going through them for child support, it might be worth looking into. It’s annoying to track everything, but easier than court.
I co-parent in a similar way—alternate weeks, split expenses 50/50, no legal agreement. Just be aware that if you go to court, they won’t just handle this one issue. They’ll set up a full child support order, and they might decide one of you owes the other money.