My wife of 13 years decided to leave me last week, citing her long-term untreated mental health issues as a major factor. We planned for her to move out, but it’s taking longer than expected due to financial challenges and landlord discrimination against low-income earners.
I want closure soon, as living together hinders healing, especially with our kids noticing. Should we wait until everything’s settled to tell them? I don’t want to pretend, but I fear revealing the truth might unfairly portray one of us. How do I navigate this without hurting our relationship with the kids?
You seem to have given this a lot of thought. Despite their inability to be happy together, my mum handled it nicely by saying she will always love my dad for providing us with kids and the good moments. It is sage to wait until matters are resolved—children will be less disturbed. Love indeed evolves, so stop blaming one another. Continue making connections with your kids. I would be happy to talk further if you like!
Brother you are in the hard part. Find your calm. Make sure the kids know they are loved snd its not their fault. If YOU are ok, they will be OK. So get a therapist and surround yourself with friends and family.