Seeking sole custody in Kentucky: Any advice?

Custody and Visitation Forum
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Hey everyone, I’ve been taking care of my daughter for about 9 months now, and her mother hasn’t been involved for about 7 months. Recently, my ex reached out wanting to see our daughter and is threatening legal action if I refuse. We don’t have a custody agreement in place currently. According to her, she distanced herself from our daughter for her own reasons. However, she has a history of alcohol abuse, has been physically abusive in front of our child (I have evidence), and has moved several times with different partners in the past year. She was also recently charged with a DUI. I want to pursue sole custody or at least supervised visits due to safety concerns. I’m genuinely afraid for my daughter’s well-being around her mother given her history. Her previous marriage resulted in her losing custody of her other children, and she also gave another child up for adoption. I’m not trying to attack her character, but I’m wondering if a judge will consider her past actions as a mother when deciding custody. I know Kentucky typically favors 50/50 custody, but I don’t believe it’s in my 3-year-old daughter’s best interest to be around her mother under these circumstances. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

EDIT:
I’ve reached a mutual agreement with my child’s mother to avoid going to court. We’ve agreed on having my daughter stay with me every other weekend, with me having primary residential custody, and neither of us will pay child support. I’m currently working with a lawyer who will draft up the agreement. Are there any concerns I should address or include in the agreement? I’ve already informed my attorney about issues like alcohol and DUI, and we’ve agreed not to speak negatively about each other in front of our daughter. It’s important to me to ensure that I have the majority of the time with my daughter to maintain her stability. Any advice on what else to consider would be greatly appreciated.

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Consider reaching out to Kentucky legal aid. You must file with the court to obtain sole physical and legal custody.

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Go to the courts and start the custody process by filing for sole custody. Present facts and evidence of her absence, as this will support your case. California is a co-parenting state, but with substantial evidence, you can be awarded sole legal and physical custody, especially since her actions have not been in the child’s best interest. Highlight that she lost custody of older children and has now returned for this one, which you believe is not safe at this time. Request no visitation until after full mediation, then supervised visits at a court-approved facility. If she seeks unsupervised visits, ask that she undergo individual counseling to address abandonment issues and secure a suitable living environment for visitations. It’s likely she won’t stay involved once supervised visits begin. Best wishes, and kudos to you for stepping up and being an amazing dad.

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File for paternity and custody immediately. Although I am not licensed in Kentucky, most states generally handle situations involving unmarried parents similarly; granting the mother all rights initially. Obtain the necessary paperwork from the Clerk of Court, a website, or another source, and file it to have her served. Once you secure a lawyer, they can amend the pleadings if needed. Request an interim order to prevent her from taking the child and disappearing. Even in states with 50-50 custody laws (like mine), courts will not grant equal custody to an addict or abuser if harm can be proven.