My male pals in their 20s and 30s have children that are approximately 5 years old. It appears that they do not make child support payments. Although they say their ex does not charge them, they are equally active in their child’s lives. It surprises me that some women in this age of inflation refuse to accept the money. Could you tell me why?
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The dads may provide sufficient support, or the 50/50 split also allocates the expenses of rearing that child equally, including covering the costs of heat, transportation, food, and energy.
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Support is given to the lesser earner by the higher earner. Is it possible that the males you know who act “perplexed” when asked why they do not pay are, in fact, the lower earners who either receive assistance or are embarrassed to acknowledge their lower income?
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My daughter’s father and I reached an agreement after an unexpected pregnancy:
I would have the baby, and he would stay out of our lives and not pay child support. I preferred this arrangement for a peaceful life and full control over raising my daughter. Now 7, she has had no contact with him since before her birth. He declined a DNA test, likely fearing I’d pursue child support, but I never intended to. Given our similar financial situations, any court-enforced support would be minimal and not worth the effort. Plus, I’m sticking to my word.
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I knew when I got done with my ex, that even though I was legally entitled to one-third of his pay till he retired, I didn’t want it. All I wanted was peace of mind.
I’ve seen many different family dynamics through conversations and understand that each situation is unique. Some mothers may not request child support from their exes because they value the active involvement of the father in their child’s life over financial contributions. They might believe that co-parenting and shared responsibilities are more beneficial for their child. Additionally, some women might be financially stable and not feel the need to ask for support. It’s also possible that informal agreements work better for their specific circumstances, emphasizing cooperation and mutual support over legal obligations.
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Hello Natalie You seem to have handled a difficult circumstance with commitment and clarity. It’s admirable that you put your daughter’s well-being first and made choices based on your assessment of what’s best for her. Your commitment is demonstrated by your adherence to the agreement and your complete control over her upbringing. Best wishes to you and your daughter.
Women who’ve escaped abuse may avoid seeking child support due to fear of the father regaining custody or visitation rights.